there's something in my eyes

bukan. bukan nangis kok. ini gue lagi kelilipan. stadium akhir. jadinya berair terus deh ga berenti berenti hahahaha :'(

saya coba nurutin sarannya umi. dan itu berhasil selama 1 x 24 jam. i didn't call your number, i didn't open your facebook page, i didn't think about you (at least i've tried, okay?), i didn't write your name on a blank paper (okay, this is getting too much).
you know what, forgetting you is easy. as easy as cutting my own fingers. as easy as burn my own toes. as easy as stab my own back. as easy as ...

well it might be easy but it also hurt enough to me. i've never been this insane before. you've completely changed my point of view, shit. i used to HATE a smoker. i even hate my dad when he's doing a job with his ciggarette on. but look at you, a heavy smoker. damn it. i used to hate a bad boy. you ARE obviously a reaaaaal badboy. aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa

i just saw your picture with your gf. you look cute together, you know. you should get her back. you should learn that distance means nothing when you really love someone. and i know exactly how you feel to her now. go chase her back, idiot. okay i'm getting a bit out of topic now.

you must be wondering why would i want to keep your watch while it is running out of battery by now. the reason is simple. i wanna keep a part of you heere, with me. so that i know that you are real, you live, you breathe out there. even if i know you would never look back to me. at least i could capture you in my mind, through that stupid watch. yessss, call me a super freak-yet-idiot girl, i am. so please, lemme keep your watch. lemme keep your memory.

when we get back to our domitory later, i really wish everything will be in a normal mode again. as usual, we will be involve in some stupid conversation. you're gonna be sleeping in class and i will be watching you there again. my bestfriend will be my spy again, telling me what you've done in class (or even when the drumcorps session is on) all day long. after the night roll call, i'll be there at the cafe to make sure that i could grab some of those stuffs you've bought, and you'll gonna be mad at me-as usual. EVERRRRRRRRYTHING is normal. i love that idea :)

okay i'm gonna close this stupid post. there's no 'something' in my eyes anymore. i hope you're happy there. enjoy your life, finish your work, i miss you :')